A sprightly 60-year-old woman was walking along 5th Avenue when she heard a voice from above:
“You will live to be 100.”
She looked around but didn’t see anyone. Again she heard the voice: “You will live to be 100.”
Boy, she thought to herself, that was the voice of God!
And then she thought it over: I’ve got 40 more years to live! Might as well make the most of them.
So off she went to the plastic surgeon. She got everything fixed, from head to toe. She was going to be as gorgeous as a 20-year-old. She was ready for her new second life.
When she left the plastic surgeon’s office after her final checkup, she walked across the street, got hit by a bus, died, and found herself in heaven.
She complained to God, “You told me I would live to be 100! I was supposed to have had 40 more years! So how come you let that bus kill me?”.
God looked over at her and replied, “Oh, sorry. I didn’t recognize you.”
Thanks to Wounded Bird